My Amazon DVD Reviews: Apollo 18

This Moon is Made Of Cheese
2 Out of 5 Stars

"Apollo 18" takes the 'found footage' horror methodology (think "Blair Witch" or "Paranormal Activity") and takes it off world. You thought Apollo 17 was our last lunar mission? You think the Russians never landed on the moon? Got news for you conspiracy minded types out there; neither of these is true. Sent up under the guise of a National Security/Department of Defense kind of Top Secret mission, our three astronauts board the Liberty and Freedom vehicles for one more investigation of what's really up there. It ain't the Sea of Tranquility, that's for sure.

Before you know it, something is making creepy noises outside the Lunar Module. Samples are suddenly not where the explorers originally left them. And them dastardly things ripped up the USA flag! Not only are these critters scary, they're downright UnAmerican! Then again, they weren't too nice to the Ruskie that landed there before Apollo 18, and the unlucky astronauts realize that their government may not have told them everything about their journey or its intended mission. The handheld cameras soon begin jerking and spinning, the automatic cameras are going static, and the humans just might be losing their minds.

"Apollo 18" mixes just enough "now-you-see-it" spookiness to add some real scare jolts, but mostly, it's dopey space B-Movie fun. The Metal Munching Moon Mice from the old Bullwinkle cartoons were about as believable as the space bug monsters wreaking havoc on our helpless heroes, and some of the effects are laughably bad. There's plenty of stock footage in use to help make the original bits work chronologically, however, as a horror movie is concerned, the green cheese that is "Apollo 18"? It certainly isn't rocket science.

   

My Amazon DVD Reviews: "Rubber"

Self Inflation
3 Out of 5 Stars

"Rubber" is a very funny 30 minute short horror satire expanded into an 80 minute mediocre movie. However, the brilliant premise of a tire wreaking revenge across the desert and falling in love is gutbustingly funny in short bits at a time. The Tire (listed as "Robert" in the credits) humanizes itself by wobbling, rolling, shimmying and doing unexpected things throughout, but when Robert gets mad, heads are gonna blow. They also discover a penchant for NASCAR and swimming pools.

The failure of the movie comes when a "Greek Chorus" of spectators gets added to watch "the film" via binoculars somewhere in the California desert. They get used to break the fourth wall by doing things like chastising one of the viewers for trying to videotape the movie. "That's piracy," one of them scolds"You could co to jail!" They seem to have been included mainly as padding, even if Wings Hauser does some scene stealing as one of those spectators. Meanwhile, Robert is rolling through the desert, blowing up things he can't mow down, and having a tire epiphany when he comes across a junkyard where the leftover tires are being thrown atop a blazing pile.

Soon, Robert has decided his steel belted brethren are ready to take over the world. A few times during "Rubber," I kept thinking about Stephen King's "Christine," and that perhaps Robert was that particular vehicle's last surviving member...and boy, was he mad. The final shot alone is a hoot and a half. Ignore the fact that this tire is over-stuffed and you'll enjoy the fun.

My Amazon DVD Reviews: Ralph Bakshi's "Wizards"

Family Friendly from Fritz The Cat?
4 Out Of 5 Stars

I saw this movie when I was in High School, in a grindhouse type of theater and - at the ripe age of 17 - thought it was fantastic. After all, it had crazy (read not Disney) weird animation, wizards, and seemed really 'adult' at the time. It took me a few more years before I discovered "Heavy Metal" magazine, but Ralph Bakshi's "Wizards" was probably as close as I got to an introduction to that kind of underground comic style.

For whatever reason, I felt a pique of interest in watching it some 35 years later. While I still admire what Bakshi did with an eccentric and new style of animation, "Wizards" has lost a little of its fascination over time. Bakshi (who started his career doing Terryoons for TV like "Deputy Dawg") wanted to prove he could do more than his controversial adult 'toons like "Fritz The Cat" or "Heavy Traffic." He also started using trace animation and the coloring in of stock footage, which makes for odd effect. But how Bakshi would consider this "family fair" is baffling, as the fairies and dwarves may be cute and fun, but the themes are strictly for grown-ups.

In the war between the brother wizards Avatar and BlackWolf between magic and technology, the flagrant use of Nazi footage sure skips the subtlety of any message, and the heroine is clearly showing her nipples under her sheer fairy wear. (As to the Anti-Nazi themes, one needs to remember that Bakshi's family came to the US to escape persecution in WWII.) The jokes are often forced and poorly timed, with the 'goons' of BlackWolf's army often slipping into slapstick that - while dopey at age 17 - now seem like jaggedly improper fits. Still, Bakshi's vision for "Wizards" was unlike anyone else making animation at the time, and kin only to R. Crumb.

I also have to admit that I am giving the "Wizards" DVD a bonus star because of the bonus feature interview with Bakshi. He talks about the politics of making the film, interesting tidbits about being pals with George Lucas and making his film the same time Lucas was readying "Star Wars," and inside stories about becoming an animator in the early 60's. His talk explains a lot about the quirks in "Wizards" as well as his future "Lord Of The Rings" movie. Even more illuminating is hearing Bakshi explain that "Wizards" is his favorite among his creations, and the only one he ever has sat down for an interview upon its DVD release. To swipe from a title of one of his other movies, "Wizards" is a really Cool World.